Amid the labyrinth of life, shrouded in the ever-changing hues of the Vancouver skies, lies a unique space. It is neither the beginning nor the end, but an in-between realm—a liminal space where time seems to hang in the balance. It’s where choices linger and the whispers of indecision become a powerful symphony. I invite you to journey with me into this ethereal realm, a place I recently found myself lost in, and emerged from, transformed.
During January’s chilly embrace, I experienced a profound loss—the passing of my beloved grandma. Grief, like a persistent thick fog, settled around me. Every contour of my life blurred, and even the mere thought of speaking about her felt like an insurmountable challenge. The weight of grief was overwhelming. I felt lost, adrift in a vast sea of crushing emotions.
Understanding the profound depths of emotions that highly sensitive people like myself often navigate, I turned to a grief counsellor. As I entered the therapeutic space, establishing safety and trust within our relationship, and most crucially, within myself, became the foremost priority. With this foundation, I felt bolstered yet was still hesitant to dive into the profound reservoir of my grief. The waters seemed too deep, too tumultuous. My counsellor recognized this and, rather than plunging me into the depths, guided me in the art of titration—taking small steps into an emotion, touching it just long enough to become familiar, but retreating before becoming overwhelmed.
Time and again, I found myself on the threshold of speaking about my grandma, only to be pulled back by a constriction in my throat. This wasn’t merely grief; it was the discomfort of the liminal space. The space where decisions hang in the balance, where the ‘to be or not to be’ of our choices weigh heavily on our souls. It’s the space of the unknown, where possibilities and fears dance in a delicate balance.
One day, while in that balancing act, I began with easier memories—moments that brought smiles rather than tears. As words began to flow, the constriction eased. My heart, like a cloud lifting after a heavy storm, began to lighten. And then, almost effortlessly, I found myself delving into the deeper memories, the more painful ones. With each word, a small part of the grief, which had settled like a heavy shroud around me, started to lift a little. And, I found the immense fear of being drowned in an ocean of my own tears never materialized. I survived this moment and for first time in a long time I felt like I could breathe a bit easier.
Emerging from the session, I didn’t feel heavy; instead, I felt an unexpected release. The liminal space, with all its uncertainties, had given way to clarity. It led me to ponder: how often do we, especially as highly sensitive people, find ourselves trapped in these in-between spaces? Whether it’s deciding to change your career, ask that person out, move to another country, return to school, or perhaps pursue a long-lost dream, it’s not always the outcome that’s daunting—it’s the indecisiveness.
Liminal spaces, with their inherent discomfort, are, paradoxically, brimming with potential. It’s a realm of magic, where possibilities take form. But to tap into this magic, one must be willing to step out of the shadows of indecision. Even if those steps are small, they’re steps nonetheless. Remember, in life, every step counts.
Each Move Holds Meaning
In these moments of hesitation, think of the expansive skies. Before the dawn breaks, there’s a fleeting moment—a liminal space—where night meets day. And it’s in that magical space that the day decides to step forth, bringing with it hope, light, and a myriad of possibilities.
So, to you who stands at the cusp of a decision, I say this: Let go of the fear of what lies ahead. Embrace the magic of the in-between but don’t let it bind you. Move forward, even if it’s just a tiny step, for in movement lies the alchemy of transformation.
If you find yourself caught in the tangles of indecision, seeking clarity, remember that there are guides ready to assist you. At Constellations Counselling, our team, deeply attuned to the emotions of highly sensitive people, is here to support, nurture, and empower you.
Step out of the shadows of the liminal space. Unleash your potential, follow your heart, and remember that staying stuck in indecision isn’t the answer. As the saying goes, every journey begins with a single step. I invite you to take your first step today.